monocat ([info]monocat) wrote,
@ 2008-02-24 21:14:00
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Entry tags:steemol

i never say goodbye
I have an aversion to using the words 'goodbye' as they seem to indicate closure - I always like to say 'seeya' - because I always assume I will see you again.

When I lived in London I had 2 people who I considered 'great friends'.
I lost one the other year & now I lose the other...

...both too early...


Steve was generous with his time with me, generous with his knowledge, generous to a fault...

I am not good at keeping in touch with him, but he's been part of me (& will remain so). I always wondered if he had that volume of the Iliad, I kept hold of a 'sponge on a stick' for years meaning to send it to him... I think I did in the end, but I still don't have his address anywhere (I'm like that - I'm just not that organised).


...so... I'm not going to be able to have a chat with him again... to drink in his company (not imbibe, absorb).

I last say him at a Caption a few years back & I was really chuffed to see him (I recall taking him back with a bearhug - I'm not so tactile, but this was steve) ... but ... I had to go early - I had to get home - I have a family who are expecting me & a job & well... these responsibilities of life... but I would have liked to stay & play, just so that I could be there.

I always assume that I will see you again & I've been a fool again.

earlyfeb94

I wasn't going to post anything - I thought I'd said what I was going to say elsewhere - nostalgia brought me to flicking through old sketchbooks for his pen marks... I'd guess this was in that cafe over the canal from the the cartoon centre (where we used to go after his class)

[edit: changed from being 'friends only' posting because I was being unnecessarily 'private']




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[info]percyprune
2008-02-24 11:12 pm UTC (link)
I loved those sessions at the cafe. You'd be sketching furiously while we chatted and ate our fry-ups. Happy memories!

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[info]nabbit
2008-02-25 12:14 am UTC (link)
Condolences.

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[info]sweetpizza
2008-02-25 02:00 pm UTC (link)
I don't like to say goodbye either, but now I never take it for granted that I will see everyone again. I've learned the hard way.

I love your drawings.

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[info]monocat
2008-02-25 04:12 pm UTC (link)
getting older is easy - responsibilities are just boring - but it's the losing people: that's just the hardest thing ever

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[info]worldofagwu
2008-02-25 04:44 pm UTC (link)
- ta for posting this, paul - i know that steve held you in v.high esteem cos he used to talk about you a lot - & w/great affection

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it's all difficult
[info]monocat
2008-02-25 10:06 pm UTC (link)
I'm really tied between feeling flattered & feeeling guilty, but thank you.

AND - thank you for the phone call on Saturday morning - that cannot have been a easy thing to do & I am grateful to have received the news in that fashion rather than stumbling over it.

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